I have been contemplating this post for some time now. Admittedly I have some fear about what responses it would bring and how it will be received by my readers. I finally decided it is an important enough issue, which I feel strongly about and therefore I had an obligation to write this piece.
Recently the US has experienced an uptick of multiple school shootings. Because of this, Liberals have once again been ranting about the need for gun control. As a little “r” Republican, I have never believed this to be a solution to the problem for many reasons which I won’t get into now. What I will do is discuss what I believe to be the root cause for these shootings that have been largely overlooked by liberals and conservatives alike, in favor of their own self serving agendas.
As I have said before, I come from a long line of educators, and was even married to one. My father was a teacher, principal, and a superintendent during his career. Because my father was the principal while I was in school during the 70’s and 80’s I was bullied on a daily basis. More often than not, I came home in tears because of it multiple times e ach week. I hated school and I often pretended to be ill in order to stay home when things got to bad.
Because I was six-foot-tall at age eleven, I was often perceived to be older than I was. The school where my father was principal, was in a small town and the elementary and high school buildings were connected by the cafeteria, with the junior high being in a separate building.
In the 70’s it was still acceptable for principals to spank students as a punishment, and my father had a paddle hanging in his office. On more than one occasion my father would spank an elementary student, and his high school age, muscle bound brother would beat me up in revenge. I always assumed it was because he must have thought I was older because I was so tall. However, that may or may not have been the case.
Luckily, I was raised by educated Christian parents who were concerned about my emotional well being and would talk me through my feelings in an effort to lessen the harmful effects on my self esteem. Let there be no misunderstanding, this was a full time job for them given the amount of bullying I experienced.
Despite their best efforts, I still ended up with feelings of depression, anxiety, and zero self worth. The one thing I did have was their constant urgings that I was worth something, and not only did they love me but God loved me also. Looking back, I believe their efforts were the only reason I never went over the edge, or had a breakdown. All in all, it took many years of counseling as an adult to reverse the effects of my bullying.
Recently the US has experienced an uptick of multiple school shootings. Because of this, Liberals have once again been ranting about the need for gun control. As a little “r” Republican, I have never believed this to be a solution to the problem for many reasons which I won’t get into now. What I will do is discuss what I believe to be the root cause for these shootings that have been largely overlooked by liberals and conservatives alike, in favor of their own self serving agendas.
As I have said before, I come from a long line of educators, and was even married to one. My father was a teacher, principal, and a superintendent during his career. Because my father was the principal while I was in school during the 70’s and 80’s I was bullied on a daily basis. More often than not, I came home in tears because of it multiple times e ach week. I hated school and I often pretended to be ill in order to stay home when things got to bad.
Because I was six-foot-tall at age eleven, I was often perceived to be older than I was. The school where my father was principal, was in a small town and the elementary and high school buildings were connected by the cafeteria, with the junior high being in a separate building.
In the 70’s it was still acceptable for principals to spank students as a punishment, and my father had a paddle hanging in his office. On more than one occasion my father would spank an elementary student, and his high school age, muscle bound brother would beat me up in revenge. I always assumed it was because he must have thought I was older because I was so tall. However, that may or may not have been the case.
Luckily, I was raised by educated Christian parents who were concerned about my emotional well being and would talk me through my feelings in an effort to lessen the harmful effects on my self esteem. Let there be no misunderstanding, this was a full time job for them given the amount of bullying I experienced.
Despite their best efforts, I still ended up with feelings of depression, anxiety, and zero self worth. The one thing I did have was their constant urgings that I was worth something, and not only did they love me but God loved me also. Looking back, I believe their efforts were the only reason I never went over the edge, or had a breakdown. All in all, it took many years of counseling as an adult to reverse the effects of my bullying.
At age 27 I was diagnosed with A.D.D., Depression, and Anxiety. Knowing this, I was extremely lucky that things hadn’t got any worse than they had for me when I was being bullied. Who knows how bad things could have become. My father had a shotgun and a rifle to hunt with in our home they were kept in the back of his closet and were never locked up. I knew how to use them, and where he kept the ammunition. It is only by God’s grace I never chose to use them on myself or others. It was a three block walk to school so I would have been able to take those guns with me without anyone knowing it before it was too late.
While reading accounts of the latest school shooting in Texas, I saw pictures of the teen responsible for the shooting. In these pictures one could plainly see he was wearing a Bisexual Pride pin on the collar of his t-shirt. I immediately thought to myself the bullying he endured must have gotten the better of him. My thoughts went back to my childhood and the bullying I some how managed to survive, and my heart broke.
A few weeks after which I read a story about two high school students, who with the help of ACLU lawyers, sued their school district for discrimination not only from other students but by the principal and other members of the faculty. These students had been made to read the bible in order they might see the error of their ways, and were also told they were going to hell, among many other forms of hate and discrimination by people who were supposed to be their advocates not their aggressors, and students alike who were allowed to do so.
There are countless articles and studies proving that LGBTQ teens suffer from a myriad of mental health issues which are either caused by or at the very least exacerbated by bullying at school and online, via social media. What makes bullying via social media so much worse it that teens never get a break from it. When I was being bullied in the 70’s, as soon as there was distance between me and those who bullied me, I was able to get a break from it. In addition to having parents that worked hard during those times to counteract the negative effects of the bullying I was able to muddle through.
I have seen accounts recently where teens can’t get away from the bullying because once they leave school it starts up on Facebook and other social media apps. I also believe there are teens who are more willing to bully via social media because they are less likely to be caught, and they are disassociated from the act because their victim isn’t standing in front of them. My mother has always said that bullying is really hard for a teacher to stop because in most cases they and administration have to witness it before they can do anything about it. The bullies themselves know this and work very hard at doing it during times when they won’t be seen by adults.
A few weeks after which I read a story about two high school students, who with the help of ACLU lawyers, sued their school district for discrimination not only from other students but by the principal and other members of the faculty. These students had been made to read the bible in order they might see the error of their ways, and were also told they were going to hell, among many other forms of hate and discrimination by people who were supposed to be their advocates not their aggressors, and students alike who were allowed to do so.
There are countless articles and studies proving that LGBTQ teens suffer from a myriad of mental health issues which are either caused by or at the very least exacerbated by bullying at school and online, via social media. What makes bullying via social media so much worse it that teens never get a break from it. When I was being bullied in the 70’s, as soon as there was distance between me and those who bullied me, I was able to get a break from it. In addition to having parents that worked hard during those times to counteract the negative effects of the bullying I was able to muddle through.
I have seen accounts recently where teens can’t get away from the bullying because once they leave school it starts up on Facebook and other social media apps. I also believe there are teens who are more willing to bully via social media because they are less likely to be caught, and they are disassociated from the act because their victim isn’t standing in front of them. My mother has always said that bullying is really hard for a teacher to stop because in most cases they and administration have to witness it before they can do anything about it. The bullies themselves know this and work very hard at doing it during times when they won’t be seen by adults.
In my opinion, as you may have been able to piece together, the only way to lessen the amount of school shooting is not to restrict the number of guns, but to crack down on bullying. The fact of the matter is, if guns aren’t available these emotionally unstable teens who have decided to harm others will find another weapon to use. Cain killed Able with a rock. Timothy McVey used fertilizer to make a bomb, inmates make knives out of sharpened toothbrushes. If someone wants to cause harm they will find a way to do it. Furthermore, most of the guns used to commit crimes are not obtained by legal means to begin with. So lets work at preventing bullies from pushing other students to the point were they feel the only recourse they have is to harm others in order to make their pain known to the world.
You may be thinking, but he said bullies work hard at making certain to only bully when adults aren’t around. Yes, I did. We will never be able to prevent 100% of the bullying, but we will be able to make it so difficult for the bullies that it should prevent them from pushing someone over the edge to the point of suicide or committing a mass shooting at their school.
I have thought long and hard about many measures which could be put into place in schools with little or no cost that will make a major difference to the war on bullying, as well as, other measures and laws that will make it much harder for bullies to commit their crimes, as well as serving as a deterrent because of the consequences . Frankly, this should have been dealt with a long time ago. After all, we have laws preventing people from sexually harassing others in the workplace, bullying at school is no different an offense.
Here are some of the things that can be done, which will be far more effective than gun control at alleviating the problem:
You may be thinking, but he said bullies work hard at making certain to only bully when adults aren’t around. Yes, I did. We will never be able to prevent 100% of the bullying, but we will be able to make it so difficult for the bullies that it should prevent them from pushing someone over the edge to the point of suicide or committing a mass shooting at their school.
I have thought long and hard about many measures which could be put into place in schools with little or no cost that will make a major difference to the war on bullying, as well as, other measures and laws that will make it much harder for bullies to commit their crimes, as well as serving as a deterrent because of the consequences . Frankly, this should have been dealt with a long time ago. After all, we have laws preventing people from sexually harassing others in the workplace, bullying at school is no different an offense.
Here are some of the things that can be done, which will be far more effective than gun control at alleviating the problem:
1. Make all adults, not just educators, employed in schools, mandatory reporters of bullying like they already are for physical and sexual abuse, with stiff penalties and fines for non compliance.
2. Make it mandatory for every school to record all incidence of bullying with the state and federal governments. This way parents who move their children to avoid punishment will be found out.
3. Train counselors to recognize the symptoms from the effects of bullying, and give them the tools to help students who are victims.
4. Offer, state provided, free professional counseling to both the victim and the bully alike. Those who bully are often in emotional pain and distress themselves and are acting out because of it.
5. Require as many adults as necessary be present at all times in locker rooms, bathrooms, hallways, or any other location where students would normally be unsupervised.
6. Use audio and visual recording devices to capture evidence of the bullying, in addition to having adults present, as suggested above.
7. Start a program to educate students, from kindergarten through 12thgrade, on the effects of bullying, as well as the consequences to those who bully others.
8. Make cereal bullying a criminal offense, with harsh penalties. This will hopefully make teens think twice when their own actions could put them in juvenile detention or prison, and at the very least prevent them from getting into college or making them ineligible to play college sports and become scholarship recipients.
9. Make Cyber Bullying a criminal offense, with harsh penalties. That way, law enforcement can get involved when kids are being bullied after hours.
10. Hold school administration and staff criminally liable when they try to force their personal religious beliefs on students, for turning a blind eye to bullying, or secretly instigating it from behind the scenes.
11. Take away government funding from public school districts who violate anti bullying laws.
12. Make private schools criminally liable for these same actions as well.
In addition to all of these things there are still a few changes that need to be made in regards to gun control:
1. Make it illegal for non-military or non-law enforcement to own automatic weapons. These weapons are not meant for hunting.
2. Make a more concerted effort to rid the streets of all illegal fire arms, given these are most often the guns used to commit crimes.
3. Require an in depth psychological evaluation in order for anyone to purchase any fire arm.
In the same way that you can’t blame forks for making people fat, you can’t blame guns for school shootings. Just as you should treat the mental and emotional side of those who have problems with obesity when you also help them lose weight, we must also treat the large issue of bullying in this country if we have any hope to see an end to it.
In closing, given that LGBTQ teens are at far greater risk of being bullied than non LGBTQ students, and many of us as adults in the LGBTQ community were bullied when we were in school, it is time for us to become vocal advocates in the war against bullying in this country. Americans need to hear from adults who have been the victims of bullying in school and just exactly what it is like. Including how it pushed many of us to attempt suicide. We also need to hear from the parents of students who succeeded in taking their own lives. We must wake up Americans to the long term effects of bullying on the children of this country.
To say school shootings are caused by bullying not guns misses the point that ours is the only civilized country where these school shootings are happening, day after day. Have they not got bullies in Canada? Or Britain? Or Australia? Or are our bullies an example of our exceptionalism, perhaps emboldened by the bully in the Oval Office? I haven't heard reports of frequent mass rock bludgeonings or fertilizer bombs or mass stabbings in other countries schools and colleges, either. Worst of all, trying to make out that school shootings is a LGBTQ issue feels like an opportunistic attempt to increase traffic to your blog.
ReplyDeleteI would hope after reading my troubles with bullying as a child would help you to realize I didn't do this just to get traffic on my blog. My blog doesn't have advertising on it at all. Its sole purpose is to be a place for Bi+ people. I just googled mass shooting in Canada, the UK, Australia, Germany, and Europe. In each case Wikipedia has a listing by year for each and in all cases they all had enough of them to make a list. The UK especially had not only shootings listed, but stabbing and bombings.
DeleteFurthermore, it is a proven fact that LGBTQ teens have a higher rate of mental health issues because of being treated differently. While it isn't only LGBTQ teens whole perpetrate these crimes, they are more likely to do so because of the amount of bullying they suffer.
This whole issue is very complex and the answer to the problem will need to be multifaceted as well. Furthermore, most sane and rational people aren't the ones committing these crimes so there has to be a mental health aspect to the solution.
Just last night after publishing this post I watched a YouTube video where a man made a homemade fully automatic crossbow out of plywood and a cordless power drill. It held and shot over 30 crossbow bolts in a matter of seconds. None of the supplies needed to make this weapon are regulated and can be purchased by teens.
Like I said, it is a complex problem requiring a complex solution. Lastly, These shootings have been going on for a very long time. The Kent state shootings happened in 1970, with a rifle, a pistol, and a shotgun. Thirteen people were killed or wounded. The Columbine Shooting was in 1999. The weapons used were one automatic machine gun, one pump action shotgun, one sawed off shotgun, 99 explosives, and a knife. In both of these cases there was no bully in the Oval Office at the time.
You are totally within your right to hold your opinions in this matter, as I am mine. Thank you for your input.